Boys Become Men When They....

(This was originally posted on  18 December 2011 on this blog)

Follow you when you walk out

Call you back when you hang up

Hug you when you punch him

Kiss you when you nag

Watch click-flicks with you

Tolerate your crying over love stories

Hand you the remote control

Pass on booze night just to listen your rantings

Don't flare up when you give a car direction

Says I'm sorry and tell you he needs you

source: http://picturesandquotes.net/

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A Clarification.

Halo!
Hey, it's been a while since I write on my blog. It's been a while since I maintain my blog alone. It's been a while since I used to passionate about being famous by blogging. I know, I might be too obsessed. However, I guess I'm grown-up now.

It's Been 2 Years

It's been two years, and nobody knows who actually deserve. There are a lot of misunderstandings that can't be recovered. This is what makes us think hard to make it clear, and at least to make people not to think that we are the one to blame. It's just about wishing that everybody knows the true stories, not what people heard from mouth to mouth and nobody's gonna responsible for it. Because it just goes from time to time, and each mouth might produce different outputs that may result in a different conclusion.

I've been thinking of my life around 3 years ago when I was in my 11th grade of High School, and when I was the one to blame while everybody agreed of the things they receive from mouth to mouth (which was not always true). And it's still clearly remembered by her, obviously. Where all eyes see me I was the 'robber', whoever people will say I'll be getting a karma.
The fact is that people don't know the truth and what actually happened until now but they don't really care about it. They don't care about the truth. All they ever care is just what the rumor says.

I know it has been 3 years. However, my life is still haunted by those people who never wanna care about the fact and likely to see me as the one to blame. Well, I think it's unfair. It is. There might be the fact that she also never notice, that all she gets now is the reflection of the way she got him. It's like karma for her but she doesn't realize cause her eyes and minds are so blind blaming me.

I also never have an intention to steal. I think she knew it at the beginning. However, maybe her mind is blinding now. So, she keeps blaming me.

I also never expected this would happen. Nobody knows the future, anybody? But my feeling grows unexpectedly. So, whose to blame? My feeling? I got it from God. Should you blame God? You never fake a feeling anyway.

I know it's probably a karma for me too. When she was on my side, I used to really hate him since he was. He's done wrong. But I never expect that the feeling comes to me one year after that. And a year after, isn't it a long time? Is she his anymore?

:)
Sincerely,
Just want to make it clear

People Can Never Escape from Their Past

The past is just the past.

We couldn't take it back or even change it.

We can't even escape it. Escape? From the past? We can't.

You will never be a better person if you never learn from your past.

The past, on the other side, is important. Not to regret about, to learn it.

We can't erase it from the memory, sometimes.

Then, take it as a learn so we won't repeat it again if it's wrong.

As a person, we have to be better each day and the past can be a lesson.

So, there's no need to regret the past.

Well, okay, you might ever regret it, but don't do that again.

Take it as a lesson for you to be better.

Finally, I Got What I Need

Hi! This is about the future again and I guess I got the answer. Like I said, "always dream and shoot higher than you know you can do". Even if we don't get what we look for, at least we learn something new in our life. There's nothing wrong with challenging ourselves anyway.

I may not get what I want, but I got what I need. At least the dream just misses a bit. And I'm still really grateful for what I got!

Now, I'm preparing myself for the new phase of my life. I know it's gonna be totally new. Living alone, away from my parents to chase my dreams. Do everything by myself, handle things by myself. I can't even imagine that. Can I do all that?

So, here I am, still confused, still kinda unready to face the life ahead, but I'm excited! Really I am! I know there might be many bumpy roads ahead of me, but I can't wait for it. I know, the next life will give me a lot of new things. I'll be getting new things, I'll experience new things which I wish can make me a better person.

I just wish, everything will be alright. And I still be good.

I'm Not Restless

 It's like punching me to the max when I've got such different recommendations and arguments, even judgments. However, I'm gonna always stick to my plan. Even I might pass that if I lower the standard.

I don't know what happens to me. I don't know about me. Why do I just too optimistic? Am I blinded? Do I really believe in fortune? Since I know, I can make my own fortune by doing good things to people around us.

I love it though I know it's really hard. People have the different perspective, and it makes me confuse. Is that what I've chosen is right? I know I'm too ambitious. I am. But I didn't consider other things. I'm just consistent with no reason. I just love it.

But still, I'm not gonna restless. I choose this and only this. Period.

Too high? I know. But we'd better try than we give up before the match. There nothing wrong with trying. What else we do on this earth if not trying? And if we failed, at least we've tried and our question is answered.

Am I Too Confident?

It's not that I'm overconfident to choose that, but..it's kinda hard to say. Perhaps, I'm just too in love with that thing until I can't opt for another thing. Or am I just too consistent? I just don't care what others choose and what the crowd is saying.

I realized that it might be really difficult. Perhaps, they think I dream too high. Anyway, I just wanna challenge myself. I know it's not easy, but I'll never know if I never try. I'm actually afraid. I know there might be the easier way, but I choose the harder. How crazy it sounds? However, I don't know, I just believe that the fortune will come to me.

I might be dreaming about the things that might be too hard to reach, and you probably think that. But I believe in myself even there are bad talks surround me. I convinced myself cause my friend also said that "you can't be successful if you don't believe in yourself. Success starts with our confidence".

I might stick with the early decision that's not strong enough. I'm consistent. I also believe, success also starts from a thousand failure. So, that's okay. If it fails, I will try again.

I hear every judgment, every advice, which not sometimes makes me think again. Can I? Can I get that? Or will I be a loser?

I realized it's really 'high-level' and I'm clearly none. I might be just too ambitious. Or too optimistic. Honestly, I'm prepared for the possible things that might happen.

I know I may fail. Or everybody knew it that I will fail. But, at least, if I fly the hopes higher, it will fall not too down low.

Teenage Years

I'm gonna say yes that's what happens to me every day, and you, isn't? Yeah, too boring, I know. And we need to zoom in this words: SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME ON THE INTERNET. I even I don't feel like opening the book for tomorrow's lesson. Or, I don't even wanna study even if there'll be a quiz tomorrow. I sometimes also do something not useful cause I hate my routine. I'm dealing with the same things, having the same boring routine.

I need to refresh my brain. I'm kinda tired, you know? Parents also seem doesn't support me, but I know it's not the thing, it's for the best of me. I mean, they do that for me.

And I feel like, my life isn't perfect. At. All. It's nothing. However, nothing is perfect anyway.

Teenage years aren't like what we expected, like too much joyful or whatever. But in teenage years, we can shape ourselves to be what we really want in the future. Well, if only you do good in teenage years.

Actually, there are so much more things. Our teenage years is not just that. It's us who aren't grateful enough for our life.

Of course in life we have problems, but God has created it based on our capability. So, it's indeed that we can solve it. We can make a way out. Just try to think clearly. Do some effort. You must try! Bear in mind that you can! You can! You can!

Most importantly, don't just talk, but do walk :)

F.U.T.U.R.E.

Have you ever question yourself what will you be in the future? Have you ever worried about it? Well, today is my turn. I mean, I'm worried now. I am now a Senior High and I don't know what to do after this. Still blank. I know, Senior High time is the worst version of me (I hope it won't worsen in the future, so I dare say, this is the worst of me).

We will age, every year our age is plus one. It's not a choice, it just happens that way. Everybody will. But, being grown up is a choice. Not everyone will. I know I'm still really young and there will be a lot of things ahead of my life. I realized that I can't be such a childish no more, even if I'm still young. I still have to think about my future: what will I be in the future?

Life is not just live and die. There are so much more than that, you know right? Even if I'm still almost-17-years-old, I think a thought about future is really necessary. We can't be just having fun all day! If we do that, then we will forget to catch the future. Well, at least I'm thinking 'what will I be in the future' rather than not think about it at all.

At least, I don't waste my time, living in the present without thinking of the future.

I hope we can fight for the future!